MistleNO!
by techno tendencies
Summary: Hermione is cheerful and why shouldn't she be it's Christmas time! But could a slight mishap with a certain Slytherin ruin her entire Holiday? I don't know... DMHG not all that fluffy, i promise


A/N: So, here it is, my Holiday fic for 2006! Enjoy it and most importantly **review**!!!!

P.S. To my 'Step Into My Office, Baby' readers... I'm trying. I'm trying to get it finished but I am at a serious block with that story. So if anyone has any suggestions at all, please feel free to review the story or e-mail me at Thanks to all of you

**MistleNO!**

"Where could that stupid box have gotten to?" I shriek was heard and then a thud.

"Hermione?" Ron's incredulous voice came from around the corner. His freckled face peeked around the corner, as though a bogart would attack him from inside the closet. With many thanks to Merlin, he saw only Hermione sprawled inside the closet, not hurt but looking as though she may hurt someone. "'S everything um… alright?" As soon as the words were out of his mouth, he wanted to chew them up and swallow them. He braced himself for an earful on how blah, blah, blah.

"I _know_ for a fact that I put a large box in this closet that was clearly marked CHRISTMAS DECORATIONS, ACCESSORIES, AND OTHER CHEERFUL GOODIES on _this_ shelf and now it's gone! Vanished! Disappeared! Just like you last night when we were supposed to _study_, Ronald." Ron shuddered and took a small step away from the closet

"Yes, um, about that…" He began but knew she wouldn't let him get a word in. Might as well make some sort of attempt, right?

"I don't know what poor, miserable Grinch – Muggle cartoon who hated Christmas but, oh it doesn't matter – I just don't know who would move a box so clearly labeled. If they moved it knowing what it was…" Ron sighed with relief as Hermione stalked off to hunt down the "Grinch" fellow and find the Christmas decorations.

"I'm hungry." Ron said aloud to himself before making his way to the kitchens.

"Harry, have you seen the box of Christmas decorations? It's labeled CHRISTMAS DECORATIONS, ACCE-"

"I moved the box." Harry told her and then he realized he'd clearly made a mistake. Hermione was not someone to vex when it was Christmas time. One second she'd say "Isn't it lovely outside? All of the snow and the laughter…" and two seconds later (literally) she'd be yelling at first years "Don't eat his eyes! How do you expect the snowman to _see_ if his _eyes_ are in your _stomach_!" It was like she had PMS for the entire month – terrible, really.

"You _moved_ my box of Christmas decorations? You know I have everything organized just so, Harry." Her eyes were ablaze with that holiday fury he came face to face with every 12 months.

"I'm really sorry, Hermione. It's just that my Quidditch equipment wouldn't fit anywhere else so I just moved the box… I meant to tell you!" Harry shrank back, ready for the oncoming storm.

"Your _Quidditch_ equipment? You can't be serious!" Hermione yelled, catching the attention of, well, everyone who wasn't already watching with (not so surprised) horror.

"Gods, Granger, you're going to make my ears bleed! It's bad enough having to listen to your stupid voice at a normal level but right now, you're using an outdoor voice. Maybe you should use your favorite kind of voice… your library voice!" The Slytherins and a few other brave students cackled at Draco Malfoy's joke. "What is all of this yelling about? Did Potter finally dump you?"

"Actually, no, he just moved my box of Christmas stuff. Thank you _so_ much for your interest in the matter, Ferret." Hermione turned on her heel to go find the box.

"Oy, Granger! Why didn't you just Accio the box?" Draco called after her in a malicious voice. Hermione stopped for a brief moment, honestly wondering why she hadn't thought of that but didn't want to give him the pleasure in turning around to look at his face. "Who says _she's_ the smartest witch, around? She can't even find a box!"

Hermione waited until she found a secluded place to whisper "_Accio Christmas Box."_

Once Hermione had found her Christmas box, she was in a much better mood. It seemed as though even Draco Malfoy couldn't bring her spirits down.

"Granger, Granger… you have a wand. Why don't you use it? Oh," he feigned sadness with a frown before smirking, "or don't you know how to use one?"

"I know perfectly well how to use one. I also know perfectly well how to hex your _little_ wand off." Hermione cast her eyes to just below Draco's belt and smiled evilly.

"Back to my question, Granger. Why aren't you using magic to do all of that… work." He said the word 'work' as though he'd said 'poop.' She rolled her eyes and continued stringing popcorn garlands over the entrance to the Great Hall.

"Because, Malfoy, it's what people with _hearts_ do. We get into the Holiday spirit." Hermione continued to string the garlands, not letting him deter her mood.

"But _why_? Why can't you get into the Holiday spirit by shopping or buying stuff? You can't seriously enjoy stringing _food_ about the castle. That won't spoil will it - because I don't want to have a moldy smell around me whenever I eat."

Hermione laughed rudely. "Maybe you should just get back to Pansy or whomever you were snogging just now." She climbed down the ladder and grabbed a piece of mistletoe.

"How did you know?" He looked scandalized at the fact that _she_ would know when he'd been snogging. He was shocked she even knew what snogging was. She extracted a small mirror from her cloak and handed it to him.

"It looks like you've got some serious Locks of… ahem Love." She sneered at the blonde who, upon looking in the mirror, grinned at himself.

"I am irresistible, wouldn't you say, Granger?" He raised an eyebrow at her, awaiting a dreamy 'Yes, Draco. You are _so _irresistible.'

"Yes, Malfoy, you're as irresistible as Neville's toad."

The Gryffindor Witch was a bundle of cheerfulness and joy for the next two weeks. She couldn't shut up (when could she ever, though?) about presents this and snow that – she even knitted a few of her favorite elves socks and hats colored green and red.

The day before Christmas Eve, Hermione was talking to Parvati and Lavender in the Gryffindor Common Room.

"Hey, Hermione, what's that stuff hanging above the doors to the Great Hall?" Parvati asked, hoping she wouldn't get the full history behind whatever it was.

"Oh! The popcorn garlands? They're adorable aren't they? They make me so hungry, though! I look at them and I just want to gobble them right up!" Hermione laughed and smiled at the girls.

"No, Hermione, I know what popcorn garlands are. It's quite easy to deduce what _those_ are. I was talking about the little green plants above the doors. Are they supposed to smell nice or something?"

"Oh! Those!" Hermione smiled to herself as though she had a secret. "_Those_ are mistletoe!" The two girls stared blankly at her. "You see, there's a tradition that when two people stand under mistletoe at the same time they have to kiss!" The last word grabbed the two other girls' attention.

"They _have_ to kiss or they _can_ kiss?" Lavender's eyes lit up at the possibilities awaiting her.

"Well, on Christmas Eve, no one will really have a choice. I charmed the mistletoe to trap whoever walks under it at the same time so that they can't leave until they kiss." Hermione smiled again, this time two others smiled back at her with the same idea.

However, one Gryffindor boy stood hidden in the shadows, smiling with an idea of his own.

Christmas Eve fell upon Hogwarts soon enough, many people having already kissed under the mistletoe willingly.

The days dragged on as Hermione waited for dinner to come. She couldn't wait to see all of the people finding out about the magical mistletoe and realizing that they have to kiss. What she wouldn't give to see some poor Slytherin girl have to kiss Crabbe or Goyle. Hermione shuddered at the mere thought of it.

Hermione shoved past everyone to get to the Great Hall to see what chaos she had created. She'd never been one to commend pranks but she considered this more of a fun holiday tradition. And then she heard it, like music to her ears (well, it sort of was).

_Deck the halls and let it snow,_

_You're stuck under the mistletoe!_

_If you haven't already gotten the jist,_

_Then come on, kid, pucker up and kiss!_

Looks of horror, delight, and shock could be seen on all kinds of people. Hermione couldn't help but smile at the way she'd brought people together. She cast her eyes to the far end of the Great Hall, just in time to see Lavender grabbing Seamus and planting a big one on his lips. She then decided: It was time.

She looked carefully before trying to sneak quickly through the mistletoe without someone trapping her. However, just as she was stepping under the archway, Ron Weasley was trying to push through the crowd in order to _finally_ kiss Hermione.

However, in doing this, he lost his chance when he pushed someone else into Hermione's arms.

"Oh, bloody hell! No!" Draco yelled while Hermione was at a loss for words.

_Deck the halls and let it snow,_

_You're stuck under the mistletoe!_

"This was _not_ supposed to happen!" Hermione let her head fall into her hands, hoping that she would wake up from this terrible Christmas nightmare. "I was not supposed to kiss anyone!"

"If this is what you call Holiday cheer, you are sick. No doubt you did this in hopes that you'd get stuck under here with me. Well, I've got news for you, Granger, this whole you and me kissing deal? Over my dead body." Draco crossed his arms and glared at Hermione.

Hermione tilted her head and glared. "Oh, are you planning on dying any time soon? I'd love to be there when it happens. If you think that I want to kiss you Mal-ferret, you should probably owl St. Mungos in advance so that they can reserve you the Crazy Suite." It was then that she recalled how she'd gotten stuck in this situation. "Ron! Ronald Weasley!" She turned to see a horror-stricken Weasley looking at the trapped pair.

"I-I'm really sorry, Hermione. I uh, I was trying to get you because I wanted to talk you." He couldn't very well tell her that he had wanted to kiss her, could he? His trance of terror was broken by a snort from Draco Malfoy.

"Talk to you?" He looked at Hermione with serious eyes. "_He_ wanted to get stuck under here with you. Well, now, isn't this a little bit ironic?" He smirked. "I don't intend on dying any time soon, I'm really hungry and I have a lady waiting for me in the Slytherin dorms so can we just get this sick little fantasy of yours out of the way so that you can tell all of your little friends that you kissed me?" He yawned and looked bored.

She glanced over at Ron whose cheeks had reddened and growled, "I'll deal with you tomorrow."

"For the thousandth time, I DO NOT WANT TO KISS YOU! I am only doing this so that I no longer have to be in your presence. It's spoiling my evening." Quickly, Hermione pressed her lips to Draco's. Both of their arms were like wooden boards at their sides. But then… whether they were imagining it or maybe it was just the Christmas spirit getting to them, their mouths moved together for just a second and their hands moved to touch one another.

And then they were thrown out of the archway. They'd finished their requirement and they were free.

"Happy Holidays, Granger."

"Happy Holidays, Malfoy."

With a smirk and a grimace, the red and green pair separated and went their own ways, telling themselves to avoid mistletoe at all costs.


End file.
